Real life & a memoir of the end of a long season

“The moment I wake up
Before I put on my makeup
I say a little prayer for you
While combing my hair, now
And wondering what dress to wear, now
I say a little prayer for you”

This song popped into my head as I thought about my post for today!

A real day in the life goes like the following.

I wake up minutes before my husband leaves for work and throw on a dress (the easiest clothing to find & most comfortable right now!)

I go straight to the kitchen and take a pre-workout that I’m in love with and my vitamins.

I jump on my laptop and get the work done that’s due by a certain time each morning!

I try to entertain my 3 almost 4 year old while my 2 year old sleeps in.

He’s amazing and keeps pleasantly distracting me from my work with things like making prisms on the wall from the sunshine reflecting off of his Picasso magnet tiles.

Right now, I feel like this a lot: I have no energy to do the extra fun things of being a mom.

You see, I’m coming to the last couple of days of being a full-time work from home mama.

And what a blessing it has been!

But it’s also been very challenging on the past 2 years since I became a mom of 2 under 2.

They are almost 4 and 2 now, so things are a lot easier with them. But in another way, they are a lot more full-on!

So much teaching and listening and loving hands-on.

And so, yeah, I’m taking a step down from my full-time job.

I’ve also been doing counseling and it has lit up my world. It’s so crazy to have someone to talk to who isn’t just a friend. It’s crazy to let her pray for me at the end and not have to reciprocate it. It’s incredible to have her listen to me and share her wisdom for my journey but not have to give back. I’m so thankful for this and it couldn’t have come at a better time.

I’ve worked in my job for almost 10 years. As you can imagine, I’ve grown up SO much from the single 23 year old I was!

When I started this job, I was just moving to the area permanently and had to land a bunch of things. I was actually switching to a weird night schedule where I was up in the morning and went to bed at 2p.m. I had been on a regular day schedule for the previous 3 weeks, and before that I’d been on a night schedule where I went to bed at 6a.m. for 6 months.

It was really crazy timing to learn a job I’d never done before. I thought I was signing up for something similar to my bank teller job, but it really wasn’t the same at all. It actually ended up taking me 3 years to learn it fully! And it has changed, oh has it changed over the years, especially recently when I stepped into more of an administrative role. Happy Administrative Professional’s day to me, yesterday! For the first and perhaps last time officially 🙂 🙂 🙂

Back then, I worked with a guy who became a dear friend and felt like a brother in the night hours. We rapped together (I mean, I didn’t really hahaha) and he talked about his amazing wife, growing family and doing school at the same time. We’d hit up the nearby coffee shop and try to make it through our shifts. He always said, you know you’re gonna be getting married and having your own kids soon enough. I believed him and man, he was definitely prophetic on that!

So many wonderful people came and went in this job. I am the person who has been there the longest, currently. I never thought that would happen! But when it works so wonderfully, you just keep a good thing coming.

I met a new guy who was taking over a position that worked with mine in a neighboring department and put his first name and part of my last name together by accident. His friend and coworker joked about it. Turns out that was a bit prophetic, too.

This new coworker was so kind and really great at his job. We wrote great emails back and forth as he sent me his work and I corrected it and sent it back.

Eventually, he asked me out and it was the best first real date that I’ve ever been on! I didn’t always connect with guys in a way where I wasn’t freaking out back then, so it was pretty amazing that he felt like a best friend. But also completely intriguing.

We got married and he changed my last name 🙂

I continued working and thought, this will actually be a great job for me to become a mom while continuing to do it.

It really was! It gave me a landing place of familiarity to return to, when so much changed after my firstborn came.

And again, when I had my second not long after.

There was a season in my job while I was having my babies that I was surrounded by some of my best friends. It was a group of women, some of whom I had known since we were single and praying for our husbands, and we got to work together while each announcing our pregnancies secretly to each other. Out of that group, we all got married and became mamas and one of the gals I’d known the longest still got to send work emails back and forth with me, even though she moved on to another role.

But now..it’s just time for a break in being pulled in all directions.

It’s time for me to enjoy them to the full and do what I love to do: teach children. MY OWN!!!

I love these ages the best out of any, always have! I love how three year olds open up and share stories and you can really become their best friend at this age. It’s so full of innocence and joy.

I didn’t put in my two weeks’ notice with a huge plan. I am not a person who has a cleaning routine. I don’t actually put on makeup usually. I actually like a bit of a mess around; it feels comfy and lived in. (I mean, I also do love things completely cleaned up, so we go back and forth!)

I’m just looking forward to rolling out of bed and completely being captivated by the games my kiddos come up with and getting to be their mama friend each day. I’m excited about not being in the habit of getting on electronics first thing, so I imagine I will have the grace not to turn to it as much. I think my body/spine will probably be a lot happier and my chiropractor will be for me, too 🙂